Do you wrestle with your purpose as a woman? Maybe you know your purpose and understand yourself, but seasons change and you find yourself juggling. Trust me, I can relate! Seasons of change like: Choosing a major in college, getting that first job, being newly married, motherhood, or tragedy can cause us to question what we are to do in each stage and season. We are in a series right now at our church called, Vision – connecting to God’s purpose for your life and it has left me thinking about how we can stay connected to God’s big picture for our lives in EVERY season as women. I want to share something that has helped me stay true to who I am and what God has called me to do in each season that is outstandingly liberating. I pray that it can encourage a few girls who are wrestling with seasons and purpose as a woman today.
Seasons change, especially for us girls! We are challenged to change the world when we are young and free and to pursue everything that is in our hearts. Then, the juggle comes when marriage, children, and responsibilities come into play. I believe that God is in EVERY season and we can fulfill our purpose in each season that He gifts us with…even the difficult ones. I also want to emphasize that it will NOT look exactly the same though. You will have to shift and change based on your priorities. I am sorry, you will not be able to do it all in EVERY season. You will need to shift and adapt, but you should continue to move forward in your purpose, even if you are not moving at a pace that you would like. Our purpose in life is a journey, not a destination. It is also about who we are becoming along the way and how closely we are connected to the God of heaven!
Almost ten years ago, I was extremely frustrated. I had 2 children 14 months apart. What? I was supposed to change the world for Jesus, but I was only changing diapers. My husband’s life went back to normal, but mine was turned upside down with nursing babies, sleepless nights, and a death of personal vision. My daily goals were to keep everyone alive and fed (honest truth y’all!) I thought, “If I could get them to 3 and 4 then life would get easier and I could get back to “changing the world for Jesus,” Then, right before my first-born son turned 4, we discovered that he had brain cancer. This discovery threw us onto “the ride of our lives” until it crash-landed with a casket in the grave. That season then thrust me into a time of grieving and healing. Here I was wondering what happened to all of those dreams in my heart. The frustration and stifling lead me to pursue life coaching. This amazing woman in my life helped me to unpack and discover some things about purpose, especially in the life of a woman. I hope I can share some encouragement and understanding so that you can enjoy each season that you are in recognizing that you can still move forward in fulfilling God’s purpose in your life. Breath out in relief my dear sister!
Here are some things that I learned about my life’s purpose as a Biblical godly woman:
1. God doesn’t change His mind about your purpose. The gifts and call are irrevocable. God wove us together in our mother’s womb with a very specific intention from before the foundation of the earth. What I learned is that who God created me to be is who I am called to be in each season although it will look a little differently. What Kathy helped me to narrow down was my purpose in one or two words. My purpose and who I am translates to EVERY role of my life to unite and never to divide or compete with the other areas of my life. You will devote more time in each area at different times of your life. As a newly married woman, you will devote more time in the wife circle. When you have young children, you will devote more time in the Mom circle. You will devote time in all of your circles, but seasons of life will shift your attention to one more than the other, but God’s purpose in your life can be fulfilled in each season! After prayer, reflection, and understanding my two words were and are: Inspiring Catalyst. I am designed to inspire others to change for the better. I love to see people get from point A to point B. Being an inspiring catalyst translates to every area of my life – As a mom, communicator, small group leader, wife, teacher, and friend. (Your circles may include business owner, entrepreneur, etc.) No matter what circle I am spending more time in, I can use my gifts in each of them to be an inspiring catalyst to others, my husband, my children, my friends, and my small group. It is just who I am! Here is a visual of my circles. You can adapt your own..
2. Know and understand yourself. Another thing that my life coach helped me to do was to know and understand how I was wired by taking personality assessments, spiritual gifting assessments, learning about what my core values and passions were, and what refuels me. Ask God to show you who you are. He WILL! Write in your journal. Listen to what God is saying about you. Take personality tests. Spiritual gifting tests. Discover your core values and passions. What activities do you like to do? My strongest spiritual gifts are exhortation, discernment, and prophecy. As a communicator, I hear from the heart of God to exhort, encourage, and connect with those who are stuck in areas of life – to help them move from point A to B (Inspiring Catalyst) using my life experiences and God’s Word. I can communicate in the way that God has designed me and not compare myself to others like, Joyce Meyer who has a strong teaching and leadership gift. Do you see how knowing and understanding yourself saves you from unnecessary stress and confusion? Having a big picture for your life helps you to just be yourself and stay true to your purpose. Using Dave Ramsey's guide in Financial Peace, I created a personal mission statement which states: My life’s endeavor is to encourage others by being authentic and affirming and to connect and inspire others to walk closely with Jesus and to achieve their God-given dreams. This keeps me focused on who I am and what I am called to do. Whether I am teaching my kids at my table or speaking on a platform, I am using my gifts and living my purpose. I am content and restful with whatever assignment God puts before me to be an inspiring catalyst. God chooses the assignments. Can we follow and obey?
3. Communion with God, a healthy marriage (if you are married), being intentional with your children, and having a peaceful home should be the top priorities of your life as a godly woman. (Titus 2) The foundation of a godly society is godly families. Who cares if we achieve worldly greatness or even ministry greatness but lose the hearts of our marriages and our kids. That’s not what God wants for us! Being a godly woman who fulfills the purpose of God operates in meekness – strength that has been laid down for the greater good. You may need to pull back from something that you really enjoy for the sake of your marriage and your children. Yes…even good godly things. We must manage and assess how much energy we are spending to make sure that we are taking care of our first priorities. This looks different for everyone and it’s between you and God! We all have a different number of eggs in our basket to pass out to each area of our lives (capacity) so it’s imperative to not compare our lives to others. What someone else may be able to do effortlessly may not be what you are able to do. (2 Corinthians 10:12) Be true to your design!
Let’s be intentional about our purpose in each circle in each season.
Seasons will shift for us as women, but they are ALL GOOD! He teaches us in each season and we can be who God created each of us to be in each season realizing that some seasons will be spent in one circle more than the other, but we don’t have to be frustrated! We just need a big picture for our lives. I so wish I would have understood all of this when my children were little. I felt like life was passing me by and I was missing out, which was not the case. I was growing into womanhood. I was growing in character. I was growing in my purpose!
Here is a challenge to you my friend:
1. Pray about your purpose words, take assessments, spend time to understand yourself, and draw your circles.
2. Determine what season you are in.
3. Journal about how you can fulfill your purpose right where you are today and enjoy the season you are in even if you can’t do everything thing that is in your heart to do. A new season will come and you will be able to do it full-force again. Don’t miss today!
Tip: I put all of my assessments, life mission statement, circles, prophetic words from God, etc. into a binder. I love adding things to it and reminding myself of my purpose! I have also started a little folder for my children with what God shows me about them.